A cockroach was seen scurrying off the field Monday night in Dallas, presumably because he was sick of watching the Washington Redskins and Dallas Cowboys field goal battle and wanted to beat stadium traffic on the way home:
It was a star-turning performance from the scavenging insect. During his time on the field, he (we're assuming it's a he) outperformed a number of players who actually took part in the game. They were, in no particular order of ineptitude:
1. Phil Costa, Cowboys center -- Costa set a new Monday Night Football record in Week 3 for "most times yelled at on camera by quarterback." I lost count around four or five, but every time Costa sailed a ball over Romo or snapped it too early, he got an earful. It didn't matter much; the balls always bounced right back to a player with a star on his helmet and one ill-timed botch led to the Cowboys' game-saving 3rd and 21 conversion.
2. Sav Rocca, Redskins holder - But not Sav Rocca, Redskins punter, because that dude can boom. His placeholding abilities, on the other hand, are straight Romoian.
3. Tony Romo, Cowboys quarterback -- Sure, he threw the big pass on 3rd and 21 but he did while wearing a Kevlar vest. A cockroach's body is its own Kevlar vest. Get with the program, Romo.
4. DeAngelo Hall, Redskins cornerback -- Even though the cockroach wasn't playing in the game or wearing a helmet, DeAngelo Hall would have found a way to get burned by it for 30 yards and have a crippling facemask penalty flagged against him during said play.
5. Rex Grossman, Redskins quarterback -- The cockroach had a better chance of outrunning Anthony Spencer than Grossman did on that game-ending fumble.
6. ESPN crew -- They didn't mention the cockroach's appearance (the shading was ours) or even show a replay of it. Seeing as how they didn't do much mentioning of on-field plays or showing replays of them, this wasn't a surprise. If you watch football to see random, various cutaways to fans in the stands, the MNF broadcast is the right one for you. If seeing good replays and hearing breakdowns of game are what you want, sorry bub, here's some more rubbish about Tony Romo's heroism on a night when his team scored no touchdowns.
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Shutdown Corner is an NFL blog edited by Doug Farrar. Email him, and follow him on Twitter.
